Inside September 28, 2004's Issue

Blunt confessions of a former pothead

Through My Eyes
By Jason Sapp
[email protected]
Staff Writer

The following account is an embarrassing and personal story, but I feel it needs to be told to make a statement about an epidemic that our society will deal with as long as there is life on this planet.

This column is meant to reach out to those of you who have someone important in your life getting into trouble. But more importantly, it is aimed to those of you who are experimenting and are about to get in over your head.

I started smoking marijuana when I was 18. It seemed fun for a while, but soon I began looking for another rush. Well, if excitement was what I wanted, I was about to get it.

I started using other drugs, including pills and cocaine. One night I was at a party. At three o'clock in the morning I had just finished a hard night of partying mixing many various drugs together. I was about to go to sleep when all of a sudden I was having trouble breathing. All of my fellow partiers were passed out.

I called my father and told him I was in trouble. He rushed over and helped me into the car. He drove me to the hospital. Everything was coming in and out of focus. I began clawing at my throat. I couldn't breathe.

We arrived at the hospital and I couldn't walk, so some nurses carried me to a bed. There was lots of yelling and screaming. I could hear, but my audio was coming and going. My heart was racing. The last thing I remember was them sticking me with lots of needles. Then I passed out.

When I came to, my father was standing over me with a mixed look of fear and disgust. At that moment I knew I was done. I wasn't gambling with my life a second time.

I made the decision quickly, but it was not easily achieved. I realized that I had hit rock bottom. I had no job and no money. I had dropped out of school. I had no real relations with my family. I was broke and had almost died.

That day, I decided to become sober. It wasn't easy, and I did slip several times. I had to drop people that were bad influences, and that was tough for me to do, but I did it. I did make it and have been sober for almost six years now.

The other day I saw someone from my past. He was living out of his car. He had been in and out of jail. He looked horrible. This was the inspiration for this article. I thought maybe it would help keep some kids from living my past experiences or his current fate.

I can not speak for most people. I used drugs because I wanted some excitement from what at the time I felt was a boring life.

At first it was exciting to do something that was looked on as taboo by society. I felt like I was going against the Man.

You see, this is how drugs clasp their horrible jaws around you. First, you do drugs now and then for fun and excitement. Then you are doing it a little more often. Before you know it you are doing it every day of the week. Now it is not for fun anymore but you can't stop. It swallows up everything in your life until there is nothing left.

I know people who say �I don't use drugs, I just smoke marijuana.� They say it is recreation and that it doesn't kill anyone. They say that the Indians smoked peyote, and it didn't hurt them. I know these arguments by heart because I used to live by them.

The truth is that marijuana is the gateway drug. It seems harmless and therefore seduces you into using it. And if you call becoming an unmotivated slouch who spends every dollar to buy more marijuana like I did harmless, then I guess it is. The fact of the matter is that eventually most people move on to something that can harm them. The choices are endless so the best way to avoid them all is to never start, or if you only smoke marijuana now, stop while you still can.

The reason that we are losing the war on drugs as a society is we don't like to talk about it. It is human nature to shy away from something that makes us uncomfortable. But we have to fight these feelings and triumph over them.

So what is the answer to all of this? We as human beings are the answer. Teachers, parents, friends, family, coaches and community leaders are the answer.

We need to reach out to children at a younger age. We need to put the DARE program back into schools in our county and throughout the United States. We need to help our children find adventure in other activities. We need to step up and be brave and tell our friends and family that they have a problem. People have to admit they have a problem before they can get help. But you can help them do that. Bug the hell out of them. Piss them off. Gang up on them. Do whatever it takes.

As long as we see drugs as a taboo subject that needs to be hidden under a rock, we will continue to lose loved ones and friends to this horrible epidemic. We have to bring this subject way out in the open and attack it head on.

When I was younger, I used to laugh when I read info on how bad drugs were. You might be tempted to do the same with this article. But hopefully, you will be more aware than I was. And if I just reach one person, then I have succeeded.

Front Page | News | Features | Editorials | Opinions | Entertainment | Sports | Poll | Travel Archives | Our Staff | Application | History | F.A.Q.'s

"Notwithstanding any language to the contrary, nothing contained herein constitutes nor is inteded to constitute an offer, inducement, promise, or contract of any kind. The data contained herein is for informational purposes only and is not represented to be wholly accurate.